Inspirational quotes that can be retired

Everyone has heard these, or read these, or had someone present them to you again again probably hundreds of times. Everyone gets them now. Please stop repeating/Tweeting/Instagramming them:

(Note: I may get a couple of specific words wrong on these quotes, but you will recognize them I bet)

1. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

You also miss 100% of the shots you miss. Pass the ball once in a while, you chucker.

2. I don't skate to where the puck is, I skate to where the puck is going to be.

Okay Kreskin. Let me know where the puck will be in say about 2 years so I can skate there and wait for everyone else.

3. "Culture eats strategy for breakfast." Ok, so this isn't so much 'inspirational' as it is 'empty'.

My 4th grade baseball team had an awesome culture. We also couldn't hit, field, or pitch worth a darn and we never won a game. But we had fun!

4. Be the change you wish to see in the world.

Really? The change I wish to see in the world is never having to see this quote again. I mean it. I am really wishing hard for it right now.

5. Do or do not, there is no try.

Ok, sure. Of course the world is that simple from the perspective of an imaginary 800 year-old puppet. Don't 'try' anything. Just do. Or do not. What in the heck does that even mean?

6. Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.

Translation: You are always right. Right?

7. Believe you can and you’re halfway there.

I believe I can be a point guard for the Knicks. Hooray - I'm halfway to the NBA!

8. If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat! Just get on.

You will not ever be offered a seat on a rocket ship.

9. A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.

This one is attributed to Albert Einstein, who had earned shall we say A LOT more wiggle room to make mistakes than the rest of us.

10. The past is a ghost, the future a dream. All we ever have is now.

This is also the mindset of the dumbest dogs you'll ever meet. Their entire time horizon is 2 seconds. This second right now and the one that is about to happen. That is it.

Ok, I am out. That is what a Monday spent catching up on email will do to me.

What do you think?

Did I miss any? Share your favorites (least favorites) in the comments.

Comments

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[Steve]

That is cool.

[Janet McNichol]

I could definitely do without seeing "There is no I in TEAM" again too.

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[more]

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[dark]

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